He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
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