I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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