im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize