oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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