This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
