I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Randomize
