Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Is that strawberry winking at me??
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
