I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...