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my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
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