At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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