I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize