everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
