Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I love you. Go after that dick
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize