Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
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