What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
