Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Randomize
