Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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