What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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