I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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