i don't like sucking hair
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
