there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
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