tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
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