Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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