my shit smells like andre
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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