I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Just cropdusted the office
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
