Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
