goodnight i made you a song goodbye
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Randomize
