There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
