I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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