i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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