good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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