I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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