she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
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