I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I think people are normalizing furries
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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