Who did Billy Mays play for?
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
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THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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