you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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