I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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