She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
we're so committed to being not committed
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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