there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize