I can't watch pbs sober anymore
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Randomize
