I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
ok first of all what the fuck
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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