Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
