What a fucking waste of an outfit
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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