I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
