oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize