your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
