just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
