How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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