I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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