I wanna bring you to show and tell
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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