Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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