I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
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