We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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